It had to happen sooner or later….All the cookies, the fudge, the dips and the cinnamon rolls. Slowly but surely my pants got tighter, (and shorter) my bra became increasingly like a vice around my chest, (not in the cup area) and my face became a little more rounded. Creeping in such a subtle fashion the pounds they came.
The peak of the creepage occurred while getting ready for work as I struggled to zip up my very favorite, very beloved, very chic boots. As I tried to cram the flesh of my calf into the boot and inch the zipper up, it occurred to me that boots don’t shrink.
I continued to zip millimeter by millimeter by millimeter until the deed was done. Of course I now had an outpouring of skin pouring over the top of my boots. (not chic) As I made my way down the stairs, I heard it before I saw it, pooooffff!! I looked down and saw that my zipper was still zipped at the top but now my calf was bulging out from the center of the boot. As I struggled to get the zipper down, it occurred to me that I might have to CUT them off. Was their a jaws of life for boots?
At last I freed my calf but couldnt leave well enough alone. Maybe it was a fluke, a simple malfunction. Surely I could not have outgrown my precious boots! So, once again, I squeezed myself into my boot and once again took a step and had another boot blowout. Now, convinced, I changed my clothing option for that day and made a note to buy stretchier boots next time.
I guess the moral of this story is this. When overindulging over the holidays, never underestimate the full effect it will have on your wardrobe.
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- Carvers Gap and Who Lost Shemeah?
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- My Big Thoughts on Back to School
- Smoky Mountain Backpacking Trip
- Backpacking with the Bieber…
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- Overnighter on the Chattooga….aka Hades
- Inaugural Hammock Trip: Kimsey Creek, White Oak Stamp, Muskrat Creek, Raven Rock Trail and an aborted trip to Standing Indian…
- Spontaneous Spring Break
- What’s in Your Pocket? And other tales from a sunny Sunday